When Thoughts Are Addicting: Breaking Free of Habits and Heartbreaks

The Process:

Day 1

The first day feels like a jarring and necessarily determined attempt to not think about whatever’s going on. Trust me, the thoughts will come. The worries will bubble up. The fear, the insecurity, the questions (why, who’s right, who’s justified, what next?). Forget answering. Forget as much as you can.

Day 2

Things will get a little easier today. I mean it when I use the word ‘little’. Not easy, but easier. The hours have piled on themselves steadily, hours in which you haven’t eaten an entire bag of chocolate chips or over analyzed, yet again, why that relationship didn’t work out. You’ve got 24 down, why not go for 48 without texting or snapping back something snarky to your coworker? Or if the problem was breaking up with your vice food (guilty), then there’s enough space to be able to say “I’ve made it one day, or most of one day, I need to keep going”. Hour 25, 26, 27…

Day 3

In some ways, it’s the hardest. Because now it’s been three days since you spoke to that other person, if there is one. Maybe three days since you saw them and so you can assume three days since they wanted anything to do with you. Are they thinking of it too? Would one bite really kill you? Should you weigh yourself? Still lots of questions but it’s not time for answers. Because the fact that there are still lots of questions lets you know you’re still in addiction mode. Addicted to thinking about it too much. It’s still got a grip on you. That’s not a sound time to make decisions or have discussions.

But you’ll be able to breathe.

Lifestyle writer, essayist & award-winning blogger for mags, books & blogs. Published by: Cosmo, Seventeen, HuffPost, Seattle Times, more. www.RachaelYahne.com

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